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Author Topic: So you want a computer eh?  (Read 4009 times)

rgfixit

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So you want a computer eh?
« on: Mar 14, 2004, 03:12 PM »
 


ABBOTT: Super Duper Computer Store... Can I help you?
 
COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den, and I'm thinking about
     buying a computer.
 
ABBOTT: Mac?
 
COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.
 
ABBOTT: Your computer?
 
COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
 
ABBOTT: Mac?
 
COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.
 
ABBOTT: What about Windows?
 
COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
 
ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with windows?
 
COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look in the windows?
 
ABBOTT: Wallpaper.
 
COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.
 
ABBOTT: Software for windows?
 
COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to run my business.
     What have you got?
 
ABBOTT: Office.
 
COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?
 
ABBOTT: I just did.
 
COSTELLO: You just did what?
 
ABBOTT: Recommend something.
 
COSTELLO: You recommended something?
 
ABBOTT: Yes.
 
COSTELLO: For my office?
 
ABBOTT: Yes.
 
COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
 
ABBOTT: Office.
 
COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!
 
ABBOTT: I recommend office with windows.
 
COSTELLO: I already have an office and it has windows! OK, let's just say,
     I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?
 
ABBOTT: word.
 
COSTELLO: what word?
 
ABBOTT: word in office.
 
COSTELLO: the only word in office is office.
 
ABBOTT: the word in office for windows.
 
COSTELLO: which word in office for windows?
 
ABBOTT: the word you get when you click the blue w
 
COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue w if you don't start with some straight
     answers. OK, forget that. Can I watch movies on the Internet?
 
ABBOTT: yes, you want real one.
 
COSTELLO: maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon. What I watch is none of your
     business. Just tell me what I need!
 
ABBOTT: real one.
 
COSTELLO: if it's a long movie I also want to see reel 2,3&4.
     Can I watch them?
 
ABBOTT: of course.
 
COSTELLO: great, with what?
 
ABBOTT: real one.
 
COSTELLO: OK, I'm at my computer and I want to watch a movie. What do I do?
 
ABBOTT: you click the blue 1.
 
COSTELLO: I click the blue one what?
 
ABBOTT: the blue 1.
 
COSTELLO: is that different from the blue w?
 
ABBOTT: the blue 1 is Realone and the blue w is word.
 
COSTELLO: what word?
 
ABBOTT: the word in office for windows.
 
COSTELLO: but there's three words in office for windows!
 
ABBOTT: no, just one. but it's the most popular word in the world
 
COSTELLO: it is?
 
ABBOTT: yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other words left? amp; nbsp;
     It pretty much wiped out all the other words out there.
 
COSTELLO: and that word is real one?
 
ABBOTT: real one has nothing to do with word. Real one isn't even part of office.
 
COSTELLO: stop! Don't start that again. What about bookkeeping, do you have
     anything I can track my money with?
 
ABBOTT: money.
 
COSTELLO: that's right. What do you have?
 
ABBOTT: money.
 
COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?
 
ABBOTT: it comes bundled with your computer.
 
COSTELLO: what's bundled to my computer?
 
ABBOTT: money.
 
COSTELLO: money comes with my computer?
 
ABBOTT: yes. No extra charge.
 
COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?
 
ABBOTT: one copy.
 
COSTELLO: isn't it illegal to copy money?
 
ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy money.
 
COSTELLO: they can give you a license to copy money?
 
ABBOTT: why not, they own it.


RG


 
 
If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

sbfpa_Mike

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Re: So you want a computer eh?
« Reply #1 on: Mar 14, 2004, 03:30 PM »
ROFLMAO,  that is great RG and scarily close to the truth when talking to any computer geek.

baginwal

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Re: So you want a computer eh?
« Reply #2 on: Mar 16, 2004, 02:51 PM »
RG,
You have the whole family laughing!! ;D ;D

Timster

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Re: So you want a computer eh?
« Reply #3 on: Mar 17, 2004, 07:40 AM »
That's real good RG;You are showing your age with this one lol. ;D
To bad fishing doesn't pay the BILLS!!
God Bless Our Troops/One Of Them Is Mine

Cider

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Re: So you want a computer eh?
« Reply #4 on: Mar 17, 2004, 08:32 AM »
ROFLMAO!!!   ;D  ;D  ;D  ;D  I haven't read anything this funny in a long time!  I could actually picture and hear them going through this schtick in my mind while I was reading it!  Best post I've read yet!  What a great way to start my day!  Thanks!  ;D  ;D  ;D  ;D

btw - you should post this on the general board for everyone to enjoy a good hoot!!

HIMO

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Re: So you want a computer eh?
« Reply #5 on: Mar 17, 2004, 09:23 AM »
hey RG. nice take off on abbott# costello's who's on first, what's on second and i don't know's on third.

                                                             HIMO
"IT'S NOT HOW DEEP YOU FISH, IT'S HOW YOU WIGGLE YOUR WORM" !!!

 



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