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Author Topic: Super Techno Craw 2010  (Read 5619 times)

Fat Boy

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Super Techno Craw 2010
« on: Jul 24, 2005, 10:20 PM »
July 24, 2010  ;)

I had a hard time sleeping one morning a couple weeks ago so I arose and went into the living room to watch TV.  I turned on the Outdoor Channel hoping a good fishing show was on and to my dismay there was a fishing infomercial on.  Well, I thought, at least it’s fishing.  So, I watched it anyway.  It was about a revolutionary new lure called the “Super Techno Craw”.  Man did this thing catch fish :o.  I know that other infomercial lures have been marginally successful, but this one could do things that no other lure could for bass fishing.  I had to have one, so I ordered one.  It nearly cost an arm and a leg, and my marriage too. 

The Super Techno Craw is a mechanical crawfish.  It was invented by 12 time Battlebot champion robot builder Bill Dabate.  This lure promises to be the most revolutionary lure of all time.  It’s legs walk, it’s pincers pinch, it makes the clicking sounds just like a real crawfish, gives off crayfish scent, and even tastes like a crayfish.  It has a camera built into the snout that feeds a picture back to special fishing glasses (included in the kit) as you work the control panel that fits on top of your baitcasting reel, called a microreelprocessor (or MRP).  You can direct the radio controlled crayfish under rocks where big smallmouth lurk, or craw it under a log where largemouth prefer to hide in an opportunistic ambush.    When a bass inhales the lure, you press a button that forces the hook into the fleshy part of it’s mouth, no need to set the hook.  Also, this lure can’t be swallowed by the fish as the tail expands and pushes on the side of the gullet preventing gut hooked fish.  The lure company, Billditrite Corporation, recommend that this lure be fished on the new superlines that are no longer braided, but rather are virtually invisible single fibers microdynemafluorocarbon, with a diameter of 2 pound test and the strength of 30 pound Trilene XT.

After lip landing your fish, you push a button on your reel that retracts the hook point allowing for an easy and harmless hook removal.  As for the health of the fish, the scent emitted by the lure also contains antibiotics that are injected through the hook point to prevent infection.  The shell of the Super Techno Craw has photochromic cells imbedded that automatically adjust the lure color to best reflect the conditions of the waters that you fish based on a formula that measures sunlight (so water clarity, depth, and the color of the substrate are measured).  In other words, all you need is one lure and never have to change colors (of course you can manually change colors by changing the defaults on your MRP)!  Want to change size?  You can change the size by changing the size settings on the MRP and the lure segments can expand or retract as much as 1/2 an inch.

The Super Techno Craw is so expensive that one would wonder why anyone would purchase it.  But, the many features of this lure can also save you money.  First of all, since you only need one lure for any situation as it changes colors on it’s own or at your choice.  Also, if you happen to break off the lure either by fish or snag, you can set your MRP to return mode, which causes the lure to float to the surface and swim back toward your boat.  If you still have trouble locating it, all you have to do is push the emergency button on the MRP and the lure emits a homing device to the fishing glasses.  Another cost savings feature is that you can locate and retrieve other lures (not that you’d need them now,  :rotflol:) lost by other anglers using the tiny underwater camera feature to manipulate the pincers to free the snag and grab the lure with the pincers, then press the return mode to have the Super Techno Craw float to the surface with the found lure.  You probably won’t need all those other lures any longer, so you can clean them up and donate them to charity, sell or give them away to other anglers.

The infomercial also mentioned that other lures are being developed, the Super Techno Frog and the Super Techno Minnow, but are not ready for production as of now.

Anyway, I took my brand new high tech lure out for a field test on my local river.  This thing casts like a bullet.  On my first cast, as I tried to figure out how to work the MRP controls, I saw (via the television picture transmitted to my glasses) a two pound smallmouth bass rise up and engulf my lure.  I nearly fell out of the boat.  It scared the poop out of me!  I pressed the hook set button and promptly landed that fish.  :thumbup_smilie: I was so pumped!  :flex: So, on my next cast, I tossed my lure toward the same hole.  But, I guess I was too pumped because I tossed my Super Techno Craw about 25 feet up into a tree.  The lure did the quadriple wrap thing around the thickest branch of the tree, tying a not that no angler could ever recreate again if they tried.  No problem, I’ll just control the lure to free itself, but whoa…it’s wrapped so tightly to that branch that the pincers can’t cut the line or grab onto anything!  I tried and tried to free the lure both manually and mechanically but to no avail.  The Super Techno Craw doesn’t bend backwards, just like a real crawfish, and couldn’t reach the claws around it’s back to cut the line.   :cursing:

I promptly beached my boat and started to climb the tree which was wrapped with massive poison ivy vines.  I wasn’t about to lose my Super Techno Craw which was worth three times as much as my last AquaViewVexilar 8000 XP!  I nearly made it to the right branch, grabbing the one below it in anticipation of freeing my new toy, only to have the branch I was clinging too snap, sending me like an orca into the water below with a huge splash.  The waves from my impact propelled my jet boat off the bank and all I could do is helplessly watch it drift downstream away from me.  They now make remote controlled jet drive motors, but I opted to purchase the standard model.  Instead, I purchased the Super Techno Craw mechanical crawfish from that infomercial.

I walked the bank about a mile downstream where I found my boat beached on a gravel bar.  I had to scare away a dozen or more cormorants who not only ate my lunch but deficated all over my new boat carpet.  Frustrated :-\, I went home after landing only one two pound smallmouth and without my new Super (expensive) Techno Craw.  I’m going back to fishing tube jigs the old fashioned way!

Pasquatch

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Re: Super Techno Craw 2010
« Reply #1 on: Jul 25, 2005, 04:59 PM »
Any chance you can get me hooked up with some of these Super Techno Craws? :laugh:

Fat Boy

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Re: Super Techno Craw 2010
« Reply #2 on: Jul 26, 2005, 06:12 AM »
Yeah Wes, you can try to order them at www.luresthatcatchfishermen.com:w00t: :whistling:

Water Wolf

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Re: Super Techno Craw 2010
« Reply #3 on: Aug 17, 2005, 12:57 PM »
Good story Fatboy,lol. ;D

WW

Fat Boy

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Re: Super Techno Craw 2010
« Reply #4 on: Aug 18, 2005, 09:18 PM »
Thanks!  Kinda a fun to venture into the future!!!

 



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